Kirk here...

[James T Kirk]

Live long and... Oops! That's not my style.

Open all hailing frequencies. This is Captain James T. Kirk formerly of the Star Ship Enterprise. I come in peace and I mean no harm. I come from a race of humanoids from the planet Earth and I am naturally curious about other life forms and cultures. I offer goodwill.

I am currently hiding out on Talos IV since the ban for visiting this planet was lifted. There is a large population of Tribbles and other creatures on this planet and theft of the domesticated ones brings a high price, especially across the Neutral Zone. Therefore, I became a Pet Detective since I was forced to retire from Star Fleet where they faked my death.

In any case, I pledge to post where no man has gone before and live long… Dagnabbit! There I go again. I have to get that phrase out of my head. It’s a small world don’t cha know. It’s a small world don’t cha know. It’s a small world don’t cha know. It’s a small, small world…

 

[ltstanfo]

Live long and... Oops! That's not my style.

Open all hailing frequencies. This is Captain James T. Kirk formerly of the Star Ship Enterprise. I come in peace and I mean no harm. I come from a race of humanoids from the planet Earth and I am naturally curious about other life forms and cultures. I offer goodwill.

I am currently hiding out on Talos IV since the ban for visiting this planet was lifted. There is a large population of Tribbles and other creatures on this planet and theft of the domesticated ones brings a high price, especially across the Neutral Zone. Therefore, I became a Pet Detective since I was forced to retire from Star Fleet where they faked my death.

In any case, I pledge to post where no man has gone before and live long… Dagnabbit! There I go again. I have to get that phrase out of my head. It’s a small world don’t cha know. It’s a small world don’t cha know. It’s a small world don’t cha know. It’s a small, small world…

Captain Kirk,

Let me be the first to welcome you to Whyzzat! This is an interesting and active group of participants and I think you will enjoy your visits here.

Again, welcome but I still think Klingons are more fun at parties. :wink:

Regards,
Ltstanfo

 

[Robert]

Welcome aboard.

 

[Glaucus]

Most illogical.

 

[faethor]

#1 go take a #2. --- oops wrong Captain.

 

[James T Kirk]

ltstanfo

ltstanfo -

I don't know what parties you have been to but let’s rest assured that just like liberal politics and their never ending deceit, Klingons reek and can only attract Klingon women. I on the other hand, have cologne mixed with Hi Karate, Aqua Velva and a secret Romulin ingredient that drives women from all planets (except Klingon) wild with passion. Klingons simply fight all of the time at parties. Boring! Did I mention that former President Bill Clinton stole this formula in 1987?

 

[ltstanfo]

Re: ltstanfo

ltstanfo -

I don't know what parties you have been to but let’s rest assured that just like liberal politics and their never ending deceit, Klingons reek and can only attract Klingon women. I on the other hand, have cologne mixed with Hi Karate, Aqua Velva and a secret Romulin ingredient that drives women from all planets (except Klingon) wild with passion. Klingons simply fight all of the time at parties. Boring! Did I mention that former President Bill Clinton stole this formula in 1987?

Umm... you have really missed out on some parties if you think Klingon women aren't fun. :wink:

Lursa and B'Etor (Duras) know how to party! 8)

Regards,
Ltstanfo

 

[eleventhma]

Welcome aboard, captain

I can assure you that we are glad to have you aboard, and that we will absolutely give you the benefit of the doubt regarding any rumors concerning countless illegitimate alien bastard children scattered across the galaxy.

 

[cecilia]

 

[James T Kirk]

Re: Welcome aboard, captain

I can assure you that we are glad to have you aboard, and that we will absolutely give you the benefit of the doubt regarding any rumors concerning countless illegitimate alien bastard children scattered across the galaxy.

Thank you. I have no idea where these rumors started. I think Sulu had his eye on me for a long time and was jealous so he started those rumors. :roll:

 

[eleventhma]

On a similar note

Is there any truth to the rumor that the reason the original Enterprise was upgraded was because the ship's computer simply did not have enough space for all of your captain's log entries due to being full of hot alien chicks' phone numbers and addresses? I mean, come on, your "little black book" is the envy of the universe, we all know that. How many terabytes of phone numbers are in there?

 

[ScapeGoat]

Welcome To Riedquat

:shock:

 

[Robert]

Re: On a similar note

Is there any truth to the rumor that the reason the original Enterprise was upgraded was because the ship's computer simply did not have enough space for all of your captain's log entries due to being full of hot alien chicks' phone numbers and addresses? I mean, come on, your "little black book" is the envy of the universe, we all know that. How many terabytes of phone numbers are in there?

Eh, I heard a rumour that said book is full of male names. Still the envy of the universe though. ;-)

 

[smithy]

Ahoy there Kirk.

 

[James T Kirk]

Please, please...

I don't kiss and tell. The fact of the matter is that the computer data banks were sufficient to store many, many times the amount of data contained in by little black book…if one actually existed.

 

[Wayne]

Re: Please, please...

I don't kiss and tell. The fact of the matter is that the computer data banks were sufficient to store many, many times the amount of data contained in by little black book…if one actually existed.

Kinda sorta on/off the record and topic here. I wonder how you will feel about the new Star Trek movie where Kirk is being written as a bi-sexual...

Wayne

 

[James T Kirk]

Re: Please, please...

Kinda sorta on/off the record and topic here. I wonder how you will feel about the new Star Trek movie where Kirk is being written as a bi-sexual...

Wayne

If "bi-sexual" means he will have two women at once, I can't say that I see a problem. Kirk out. :shock:

 

[Glaucus]

Re: Please, please...

Kinda sorta on/off the record and topic here. I wonder how you will feel about the new Star Trek movie where Kirk is being written as a bi-sexual...

I guess Mr Sulu will have a much bigger role then.

 

[James T Kirk]

Re: Please, please...

Kinda sorta on/off the record and topic here. I wonder how you will feel about the new Star Trek movie where Kirk is being written as a bi-sexual...

I guess Mr Sulu will have a much bigger role then.

If that homo sets foot on my bridge I'll drop kick his gay @$$ into the next parsec! I can't believe the Federation puts up with that $#!*

 

[Wayne]

Re: Please, please...

Kinda sorta on/off the record and topic here. I wonder how you will feel about the new Star Trek movie where Kirk is being written as a bi-sexual...

I guess Mr Sulu will have a much bigger role then.

If that homo sets foot on my bridge I'll drop kick his gay @$$ into the next parsec! I can't believe the Federation puts up with that $#!*

Whoa there Jim. While I strongly rail against the whole political correctness thing, and I welcome people to be offended -- because I think they need to be some times in order to keep things in perspective, you might want to reconsider the rampant and relatively offensive homophobia there buddy.

Keeping in mind that in this latest reincarnation, most kids will come to know James T Kirk as -- minimally -- a bi-sexual, things aren't looking up for you, except in that whole "I get what I want" department.

Wayne