Bizarro News

[metalman]

British woman fined 80 pounds for pouring coffee down drain

"Andrew Wiseman, of environmental law firm Harrison Grant, told the Telegraph the act of pouring the coffee down the drain may have violated laws against introducing “poisonous, noxious or polluting matter” into the drainage system"

 

[metalman]

She carried out the crimes because the men failed to get her pregnant.

 

[metalman]

Gwyneth Paltrow Recommends You To Put A $66 Jade Egg In Your Vagina

OB/GYN: ‘Gwyneth Paltrow Is Dumb, Don’t Put Rocks Up There, Holy Shit’

Not sure if Gwyneth Paltrow recommends that women to steam their vajayjay while doing the egg thing, or are these separate operations??

 

[redrumloa]

Probably goes without saying, but...

NSFW

Naked Workout Day At LA Fitness?

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/824393079452864512

 

[Kesa]

This does explain a lot...

Hamster Cannibals

 

[metalman]

'Dr Evil' tattoo artist accused of removing customer's ear, splitting client's tongue and slicing off someone's nipple

 

[metalman]

Two men were arrested and charged with engaging in lewd behavior on a display bed at Bed Bath & Beyond during regular business hours.

"it's not yet known if the suspects were intoxicated or under the influence of a controlled dangerous substance"

 

[redrumloa]

Two men were arrested and charged with engaging in lewd behavior on a display bed at Bed Bath & Beyond during regular business hours.

"it's not yet known if the suspects were intoxicated or under the influence of a controlled dangerous substance"

Names not being released due to HIPA, because they had SCABIES?!? :smh:

 

[metalman]

Since turning 18, pepper-spray suspect is accused of committing a felony a day, until arrested.

Erica Abraham who turned 18 in January, sits in Broward County Jail on $356,000 bond covering the 10 felony charges and a misdemeanor involved in all of the above. She has pleaded not guilty to all charges.

 

[metalman]

CASS COUNTY, Mo. -- A teenager upset over the New England Patriots' victory in Super Bowl 51 is facing a felony charge for threatening his high school. Prosecutors charged Jashon Taylor, 17, of making a terrorist threat, a class D felony.

 

[metalman]

Angry Muslims burned down their refugee center in Dusseldorf after the complex ran out of Nutella and Gummy Bears.

 

[metalman]

Burglar suing for $10million after getting shot in the butt by Queens police claims he has 'nightmares of being killed by officers and fear of anyone in uniform'

Felix Perez, who is acting as his own lawyer, states in the lawsuit: 'I was shot by an officer of the 104th Precinct while trying to flee the scene of a burglary.


A bloody Perez made a run for it as patrol cars arrived on the scene, forcing cops to chase him through the neighborhood.

'I heard a shot. I turned and saw a guy with a mask and gloves run past', Roy Johnston, 42, who lives across the street from the scene, told the Daily News.

The bullet, which 'barely missed my femural [sic] artery, urethra and rectum', is lodged in his butt, Perez states in his lawsuit.

 

[FluffyMcDeath]

Felix Perez, who is acting as his own lawyer, states in the lawsuit: 'I was shot by an officer of the 104th Precinct while trying to flee the scene of a burglary.

Yeah, I can see the "he's totally a crook, what did he expect" kind of angle on this, but it's not that ridiculous. If you shoot a guy in the but it's hard to argue that you felt in immediate threat for your safety - unless he was running backwards at you in a threatening way. Cops shouldn't be shooting at fleeing anyones - it's just dangerous and I'm pretty sure it's usually against policy.

 

[redrumloa]

Since turning 18, pepper-spray suspect is accused of committing a felony a day, until arrested.

Erica Abraham who turned 18 in January, sits in Broward County Jail on $356,000 bond covering the 10 felony charges and a misdemeanor involved in all of the above. She has pleaded not guilty to all charges.

Glad she was caught. This is all extremely local to me, some of the places my wife and daughter shop at. Hopefully this sub-human mongrel will be going away for a long, long time. Luckily Obummer isn't in office anymore to send down Messy Jackson and Reverend Al Charlatan to defend her, or to claim if he had another daughter...

Oh yeah, the victims were all white women while the perps black. This is a very diverse area, so the victims were specifically targeted for being white.

 

[metalman]

Town officials want to lengthen Dick Street

 

[metalman]

Performance Artist & Musician does an Onstage Enema

One of the bands scheduled to perform was Sonic Rabbit Hole, a two-piece noise rock act that includes elements of performance art. Singer Michael Clemmons said he and his band partner, who has not been identified, decided an onstage enema would be the perfect statement against the venue, where they’ve had issues in the past.

 

[metalman]

2 women accused of killing Garden City teen over big 'booty' comment

 

[metalman]

Man spends $50,000 on over 100 procedures to transform into a 'genderless' ALIEN (and he plans to have his genitals, nipples and bellybutton removed next)

 

[redrumloa]

 

[redrumloa]

Do you remember GLOW?

G.L.O.W. Trailer Brings the Ladies of Wrestling to Netflix

During a press event in Berlin earlier today, the Netflix streaming service unveiled the first trailer for their upcoming series G.L.O.W., which reveals that the show will be coming to Netflix Friday, June 23. The trailer showcases just a few of the colorful characters that will inhabit this unique world of a women's pro wrestling league. While these characters may seem larger than life and stranger than fiction, the show is actually based on a the first ever women's pro wrestling league.

I watched the show as a kid. It was both annoying and entertaining. The annoying part is hilarious to look back on. Still annoying, but now ROTFLOL hilarious! Soooo 80s...